What insurance would Hogwarts need?

Well, considering there are young, underage witches and wizards running amok, probably a lot of insurance.

So, Hogwarts is (obviously) a magical place. Like, literally a magical place. There’s a lot of stuff going on, from Potions class to Defense Against the Dark Arts to Herbology. Of course, there are a ton of young witches and wizards running around the castle, learning magic and such, so needless to say there’s a lot of risk. And that means insurance!

Have questions? Chat with us now.

What insurance would Hogwarts need?

Well, there would probably have to be some kind of property insurance for the castle itself. Wait – would it be magically protected from things like fire? It would probably be a good idea to make sure that the coverage includes “spontaneous kabooms coming from the Potions classroom” right? Or like, Peeves getting annoyed and going on a “smashing stuff” rampage through the castle?

Oh, and maybe general liability insurance would be important. You never know when someone could take a faceplant when visiting the school. Like Lucius Malfoy when he’s being a creep – you know he’d be the type to sue if he happened to fall down a staircase or something.

And what about the professors? They would probably need some sort of workers’ comp coverage in case they get hurt on the job. (Considering that they’re teaching young wizards and witches, there’s some significant job risk here.) What if Neville blows up a cauldron and injures Snape? Or what if someone accidentally Transfigures McGonnagal into a hamster? Hogwarts workers’ comp would have to cover such things.

Dislike boring forms? Get a quote over chat right now.

And of course you can’t discount the possibility of Death Eaters swarming the castle. It would be important to make sure that the insurance policy doesn’t exclude Death Eaters destroying stuff because they’re super annoying and evil and stuff.

Also what about the horseless carriages that take the students from the train station to the castle? Would those need some sort of commercial auto insurance? It’s something to think about.

So, yeah – we’re not sure what sort of insurance carrier would want to write a magical boarding school…but you never know. There’s got to be some form of wizarding insurance out there, right?

Disclaimer: We are not affiliated or associated in any way with the companies listed. Each name and character is a trademark of that respective company. This article is for informational purposes only and does not supersede any language in the actual policy itself. Please refer to your policy for deductibles, exclusions, and other provisions.

Leave a Comment